21 Years

Today is Teachers' Day. Today I'm 21.

I have be living for 21 years, about a forth of my whole life. I want to know what I am feeling, but strangely, I don't have any feelings.

I have realised the very value of my life, because I have realised the horror of death from my inside. I try to recall my 21 years, and find it really bored. But I want to make a summary.

I was born in a family not poor, and had a complete set of relatives. The seniorities was so much that I felt I was not of myself, but of them, even until now. I had a good friend called WangXin. When I met him after many years, I was rather taller than him. I am not satisfied with my childhood, because I think I won't have any time so happy without worry again. But I'm not so happy without worry at that time. It was just like a lake without tide.

I studyed very well. I had the pressure from my family. It was common in China. I made many mistakes that I regreted in my primary school. And in the junior high school, I missed too many people. I mean, I should catch them... but losed them... I don't want to express clearly, because I 'm not clearly myself. In the senior high school, I was busy for the College Entrance Examination. In China, it's a threshold of every youngster. I think I have my first love at that time, but losed it more easily. I did so because I was timid, and I couldn't. Even now I also think so. At that time, I was just 一时情浓，意乱情迷；一时迷惑，然后一路犯错. The picture below is my senior high school.

Now I'm in college, still confused about my future. But, I will not wander in one place.